The picture of this decadent dessert that I enjoyed last evening, was the “before” picture. Though I didn’t take an “after” picture, trust me when I tell you that I didn’t leave a crumb. (I refrained from licking the plate though I came very close 😊). Why am I sharing this picture with you? No, it’s not to cause your mouth to water. I’m using this picture to provide an analogy regarding some wisdom I am learning to integrate and embody in my life. It comes down to this: “If you want the whole cake, then why settle for the crumbs?”
Why is it that so often many of us accept the belief that we can’t have “the whole cake”? Why is it that we resign ourselves to the crumbs, the scraps, the left-overs? Where in our upbringing have we been taught that there “isn’t enough” and we should “accept what we get and be grateful for it”? For many, the real struggles and pain our ancestors experienced – for example during the Great Depression – may be part of the cause for this teaching, and I understand that they were trying to prevent the same painful experiences in the lives of their children.
I wholeheartedly believe in having gratitude for the many blessings we are gifted in life and have deep appreciation for all that my parents and ancestors sacrificed for me. What I’m referring to here, in terms of “accepting crumbs” doesn’t involve material needs, comforts or possessions. Instead I am referring to the “accepting of crumbs” in other areas, including jobs, relationships, and life experiences. While I understand that there are instances where we can’t easily separate these areas (i.e. when a job choice is solely tied to putting dinner on the table that night), just go with me here for a bit and see if it resonates.
I believe that as souls, we are born with the inherent knowing that we are worthy and deserving of “the absolute best.” We understand and accept our worthiness without question. I believe that we also come with the faith and trust that we have the power to create the “absolute best” life experiences we desire. I believe that when we enter this Earthly experience, we come with the wisdom that as children of God/Source/Creator (whatever term you choose), it is our Divine birthright to access to all the gifts that God has to offer.
But somewhere along the way, we lose that understanding and instead begin to accept the “worldly view” which is based on a “lack mentality” and a belief of entitlement for the “select few.” We only need to look outwardly at the material world to see how this belief has played out, both individually and collectively. What happens for many, is that they choose to focus on this “reality” and end up little-by-little giving up on the belief that they can create the life of their dreams. I fully believe that we all hold the power to create the life of our dreams -including material abundance – if that’s your dream (but that’s a subject for another day.)
When we accept the belief that “only some can have it all,” then that seeps into every other area of our life. Slowly the assuredness we once held as new souls begins to disintegrate. The absolute trust that life could provide abundantly for us in the form of our Creator’s greatest gifts – love, joy, happiness, peace, prosperity, passion, fulfillment, connectedness, compassion, etc. – so often begins to disintegrate. Sadly, what may end up replacing that knowing and trust are destructive traits like cynicism and pessimism.
I believe that we can learn to remember and accept the truth that is our Divine birthright…that we are powerful creators and we can create the life of our dreams. I have also come to believe that until we fully accept another truth – that God/Source/Creator is shouting from the rooftops – we will never fully attract and experience the “best of the best.” What is that other truth? I’ll sum it up in three words… YOU ARE WORTHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Are there areas in your current life where you are accepting “crumbs”? Are you settling for less than you deserve in that job, relationship or other life experience? Do you subscribe to the belief “better the devil you know than the devil you don’t”? (I hate that saying by the way). Are you clinging and clutching to crumbs for fear that if you let go, you’ll end up with nothing? Maybe it’s time to take a good, hard look at that and see where you may be self-sabotaging and preventing the “best of the best” from entering your life. As always, do this not with self-criticism, but rather with self-love.
There’s nothing easy about the process of honest, self-inquiry. It often brings up painful parts of ourselves that we would rather leave buried. For if we face these areas that are calling for our attention, it may require us to make a change of some sort, maybe a small one or maybe a monumental leap of faith. We all know as humans, that change is scary, especially if it’s a big one that’s necessary. It’s also quite painful to see where we may have allowed our patterns of accepting “less than” into our lives.
For me, I’ve realized that the only way I can help to create my best life, is to see where I have lost the belief in my own power and my own worth. I’ve had to look honestly at the ways in which I have “played the victim” or engaged in any form of self-sabotage. I’ve had to make those changes…the small ones and the big ones. It’s never easy, but in my opinion, it is so worth it. It’s a life-long process, this commitment to self-inquiry, self-improvement and self-mastery, and there are days when I just don’t have the energy for it! That’s o.k. too, by the way. There are times when not taking any action is the best course of action. Also, as I’ve written before, everyone has their own path and there is no “one size fits all” in terms of this process of self-mastery.
Are there ways in which we can learn to fully embody the truth that we are both powerful creators and that we are worthy of the best? I believe like anything in life, it begins by taking baby steps. Perhaps it could be as simple as saying “no” rather than “yes” to appease another. Perhaps it could be graciously accepting a compliment without feeling the need to “play it down”. Perhaps it could be boldly expressing your opinion even if it goes against the majority. Perhaps it could finally be asking for that raise you know you deserve (side note – I did this recently and the outcome was better than I even imagined).
Or perhaps it’s a matter of allowing yourself to indulge in the simple pleasures in life WITHOUT THE GUILT, as I did last evening. Go ahead, pick up that fork and EAT THE WHOLE DAMN CAKE!!!! (the ants will take care of the crumbs.)